Earlier today, I left the kids and husband in the toy section of Target while I browsed the workout clothes. As I meandered through the sports bras and water wicking material, I became aware that the group of four 20 somethings, shopping with their mother, were discussing me. They called me “fatty” to themselves and joked about how I didn’t belong in that section. It hurt, and I was embarrassed. I wished I could think of the perfect biting comment, the perfect Pretty Woman “big mistake, HUGE” kind of retort that would shut them up. But, I made the decision to not defend myself, and just calmly walk away. I told my husband and kids later that they made me feel bad for a few minutes, but being the kind of people who would randomly insult a woman in Target tells me that they feel bad about themselves a lot more of the time.
And in general, I’m really happy with my life. Some morons in the workout section are not going to change that. The biggest turn around in my issues with self-esteem came when I asked myself if I would treat other people the way some people were treating me. Instead of automatically taking the insults on, and assuming I deserved it, I asked myself how I would act if the tables were turned. There is NO WAY I would be unkind to someone like that. So how can I be deserving of that kind of treatment? The fact is that we will bump into people in this world that will use our assumed circumstances to judge themselves against, and sometimes we will become the thing they hold up to themselves and others to prove that they are worthy. It doesn’t mean they are. And because we aren’t the kind of people who would do that to others, we can be assured that we are happier and emotionally healthy.
Like I said, those women made me feel bad for a bit, but I know who I am, and I love my life. It doesn’t hurt that my family wanted to defend my honor, and rushed to make sure I knew how loved I am.
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